What do you use to get weighed, a postage scale? Introducing yourself to someone new is always scary, whether you're on an app or in person, since the possibility of rejection is part of the deal. Carl, you given me a half-eaten box of candy. Carl Otis Winslow: Ohohoho and they are personal and private. Every time I'm around them, my mind goes blank. Pull your gun right now. Every year, my relatives send me money in hopes that I won't visit them! I felt like I was one with the Bee-Oh-Sphere. But our little town only had ONE library, and it was for whites only. Trying to cover it up would only make it worse. Could you write that 'A' down on a piece of paper? Carl Otis Winslow: Why not try the truth! Boyd broke my glasses. I have feelings. Mont gio sam eea!". I've had more food than this stuck in between my teeth. But I recognized him right away. Laura Lee Winslow: You couldn't check out a book? I just got a job! 102 Pick Up Lines to Break the Ice: Funny, Cheesy, and Cringe - Best Life Carl Otis Winslow: I didn't bring my gun. I've decided to retire from the theatre arts department. Laura Lee Winslow: If you have to ask, pass. Steve Urkel: Laura, suppose I arrange for you to meet Johnny Gill personally. Uh, Curtis. It's either a number or a letter! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Oh, no thanks, I went before I left. Rachel Crawford: Steve, did it ever occur to you that when the door is closed we're trying to keep unwanted people out? Eddie: No, grandma. Steve Urkel: Why, to make everyone think that the woman I love actually loves me back? A bee to a blossom. Carl Otis Winslow: You know son, if Screwing Up ever became an Olympic event. Not when it's swirling around a porcelain tank. I"m going to the mall to hand out gifts to orphans kids. I can teach you how to cook. When I look in your eyes, I see a very kind soul. It's the closest I'll ever get to marrying you- thats why I wanted you to have this- no strings attached- just the one to my heart. Eddo. He woke me up too. Eddie: I don't see what getting beat up is gonna prove. He's gonna drive us tonight. You know you'll never reach it, but you have to keep trying. I'm a person, and I have feelings, and I demand to be treated with respect and dignity! Carl Otis Winslow: [Grabs his wallet] How much do you need? You are such a sweetheart. Steve Urkel: Ssssh, not while I'm pouring. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh nothing, never mind! Did I do that? 2023. Look how big and thick it is! Curtis: I know you're disappointed. Steve Urkel: I have to tell you, Mr. Winslow. You got the whole family off on the wrong foot. [Grabs and kisses her. Steve Urkel: Hi Laura, my little sweet potata! Oh, yes it is! Carl Otis Winslow: [after bringing Eddie home from jail] Now Edward, stop looking around for Steve. He's never used his! [Eddie has just realized his mistake in standing his father for the chance to go out on his date with a girl that he likes]. Steve Urkel: I can't! There's a lot of bad pickup lines out there. And I'll be coming home tomorrow. Laura: Sure, Steve. Laura: There's an Urkel in our defense department? [looks over to the busted parts of the transformation chamber]. Carl: Are you implying that you're not having a good time? You're acting like animals! Laura Lee Winslow: Does shag carpet also make you crazy? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: L means lousy. I wanna take it home and read it to my mom. Money has germs on it. Steve Urkel: No state your name not name your state. You're so beautiful, you take their breath away. I love ya too much to build you a dud! I'm getting dizzy. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Next Saturday. I offered you my heart and you stomped that sucker flat! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Can it be a 976 number? So, what's cookin', good lookin'? Carl Otis Winslow: Well sweetheart, if you feel that strongly about it, maybe you should do something about it. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Fletcher has a bigger family then we thought. 4 Mar. He doesn't have the advantages to see how good the cops are like our kids have. Let's call it recycling. Oh when he shows up, it's amputation time. [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the next name]. Harriette Winslow: Carl Winslow, this is the most insensitive, unromantic gift I have ever received. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'm not dreaming anymore. Carl: Harriette, there is a car in the living room. Carl Otis Winslow: That a girl, Harriette. Steve Urkel: Whoa. Laura: No! The wind has chapped my lips. This semester we're Steven, you'd better get going. Don't they teach Black History at your school? One minute, "Moo!" Steve Urkel: Then your nasal passages swell and your nose and throat slam shut tighter than a clam. What do you get when you multiply a negative by a negative? Cop: [Searching Willie and Waldo] Ok, where did you hide the booze? Carl: I don't have to take this, I'm going home! Carl Otis Winslow: Hey sweetheart, how about some pie? I was in a high-speed car chase and ran out of gas. Steven Quincy Urkel: But I'm going the recommended cruising speed for this vehicle Any more could be risky. I didn't expect you to be in there and I feel like such a worm. Laura Lee Winslow: That's right, I don't know, and I still like the Cards. Steve Urkel: Well, isn't that just a FIIIINE kettle of fish? So I walked in the library, sugar, I couldn't believe my eyes, there were THOUSANDS of books just sitting there waiting to be read. When you make a mistake, fess up to it. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You won't be sorry, sir. [Turns and squirts filling on Carl's shirt]. Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I was steamed, I didn't want to do something I'll regret. Your eyes are like the ocean; I could swim in them all day. Willie Fuffner: I'm gonna trash Urkel's locker! When the door opens Carl appears dessed up as Steve normally dresses with his glasses]. Laura: Well, that's because you have self-confidence. [reading] "Mongu! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well of course it's a Greek party, it's a sorority! Big guys have never played keep away with your hat on a cold day. Steve Urkel: [runs back into the living room] Sorry Rachel! Stefan Urkelle: I'll have to buy new parts for the chamber. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, there is a child outside digging up your azaleas. Steve Urkel: Sh-she touched me, Carl! Laura, please. I'm here. It's a cool chamber. Harriette Winslow: Before you stormed out of the house, I forgot to mention to you that I called OGD's Grandmother back in Detroit. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's that? Would you care to heal them with a kiss? [to Steve] I'm wearing you DOWN, baby! Carl Otis Winslow: [to the racist cop who pulled Eddie over] You know, I don't know how that badge stays up, because it's pinned to sludge. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Bye. In Season 1 he was a supporting character and made his first appearance as a background character in Rachel's First Date and had his first major role in "Laura's First Date", however as of Season 2 he was officially considered a main character . Steve Urkel: Why, come back here, you little hussy! Rachel Crawford: Right. Willie Fuffner: I'm gonna trash Urkel's locker. Lt. Murtaugh: Keep the pace, Mr. Backwards Hat! Robbins: Hey everyone, Laura Winslow's date is Steve Urkel. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: You paid him off. Well, that's gonna stop right now! I'm sorry, call you next week? Jaleel White had a very busy handful of years in the '90s. Laura: Steve, did you eat that moldy cheese? You're always sorry. What are you doing with these bells? And I hear myself telling her the same things my mother told me. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: The party doesn't start until 9 and my curfew's at 10. Laura: Look, I owe you an apology. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [is chased and hides behind a jock] Hold me back, hold me back. Laura: Don't argue. All these people think the party is tonight. Baby Girl: You couldn't push me out of this park if you wanted to! From 1989 to 1998 (via IMDb ), White . Why, it'll ruin my transcript! Eddie: Isn't there somebody else you could annoy? Bushwhacker Luke: Me mother was arrested by cops last night! Steve Urkel: This page is in Korean. That one friend who says going to gym will solve everything. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It was on his tongue! Wa chee! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: I couldn't even go in. Carl Otis Winslow: [Has just gotten wind of Eddie's flyer party] Edward! Steve Urkel: Of course. Gosh I bet that's never happened before. [leaves]. That's all. [after Carl as defeated Turbo with ease, Harriette runs up to him with her purse]. I bought a new dress and you say you can't take me? Waldo: [Monotone while Steve mouths his words with him] Pablo was a kind and gentle creature. Dad took Waldo instead of me. We'll start with a common Korean phrase. Carl: [in his regular voice] I have no idea. Steve Urkel: I can't! I had 8 shots of Espresso, a 6-pack of Jolt Cola, and a large bowl of Froot Loops with extra sugar. Rachel Crawford: Steve? Grab a blanket and go sleep in the bathtub. Mucus comes in so many colors. Laura: Every time we order another course, you bring your chair closer. There's lots of reasons why I don't love you. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: What's wrong? Steve Urkel: I just called my uncle at the Pentagon. Lt. Murtaugh: I dropped the, uh, nerd off next door at the, uh, nerd house. [Steve thinks Rachel is in love with him, but she is really in love with another man named Steve]. Laura: Steve, I know it's a lot to ask, but I'd really appreciate it if you'd tutor Todd. Carl: I can't tell him I don't remember him! Steve Urkel to Return in Fuller House Season 4? - MovieWeb That's the last time I do anything for anybody in this house. He couldn't cover his head with his hat. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Uh, uh isn't this the Zorro audition? Steve looks at Laura], [At The Winslow home in the alternate world]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No no no no no. Dec 25, 2011 - Explore Nadia Hussein's board "Steve Urkel", followed by 259 people on Pinterest. They just love juicy gossip. Sorry I'm late, but I got my tongue stuck in the printing press. Carl Otis Winslow: He and Steve got busted for gambling. Who? Carl: 3, 2, 1 1, 2, 3 What the heck is bothering me? Waldo Geraldo Faldo: O.k., but I'm not Home. Just blacked out for a second there! Uh, we're, uh, playin' hide and seek! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Way to go Carl! Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Well for one thing, I can't feel my toes. Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem. Steven Quincy Urkel: Don't interrupt me! Steve Urkel: [reading] "No mouth breathing, no snorting, no drooling". Maybe a better word is Loud. Harriette Winslow: [feigns being touched] Oh, Carl this is beautiful. Waldo put today's date on the flyer. What's for dinner, milk and cookies? He heads downstairs to confront Steve]. And I don't get many calls! I mean the guy's a feeb. But you'll never play in this game again. 36 Steve Urkel ideas | steve urkel, humor, funny - Pinterest Carl Otis Winslow: Tell me Harriet, before I left for work this morning, did I or did I not tell Edward to empty the trash can? Steve Urkel was the breakout character for the hit Friday night ABC sitcom "Family Matters" while Jaleel White who played him was the show's breakout star. It's late. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What the heck is wrong with you? Harriette, THERE IS A CAR IN THE LIVING ROOM! Harriette Winslow: So Oona how are things in Altoona? Second, no one must ever know about this "non-date". Myrtle Urkel: Oh, just two weeks. Carl Otis Winslow: Edward Arthur Winslow, son I'm ashamed of you. Eddie: I don't believe wat just happened, dad took Waldo to the bulls game. Stefan Urquelle: You can take a bus or an airplane. Carl Otis Winslow: Now honey, it's really ok Harriette Winslow: No it's not ok, Carl. Eddie, your father left you three messages for you and you never called him back. Get up and get your own pie! [Steve comes out of the freezer at Rachel's Place shivering]. Eddie: Oh no, I forgot all about the car show. Well if he does it again, I'm gonna grab his bellows and make a wish. Steve Urkel: No, but it was moving kinda fast. Carl Otis Winslow: How about if I convince Laura to go out on a date with you. You're late for class. right next to the bathroom. I'm cooking breakfast. I do not like 30 people hanging around my shoulder, saying "Hey Senora, can you eat a little faster?". Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I'm missing the parade. Stefan Urkelle: Not I know that's not Carl. [smiles]. Steve Urkel: So, you used me! Laura Lee Winslow: It was just a little practical joke. It's like wanting to touch a star- you know you'll never reach it but you've just gotta keep trying. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, stupid means good. Eddie swoops in and starts taking pictures]. Laura: Urkel, don't your parents feed you? It was my nickname in preschool! The bad news is, he'll charge you an arm and a leg. Like a moth to a flame. Kanye West name-dropped "Family Matters" star Steve Urkel on his My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy track, "Dark Fantasy." However, Ye originally thought a similar line rapped by T-Pain was "corny," the "Buy U A Drank" singer claims.. As reported by HipHopDX on Tuesday (Sept. 7), T-Pain says Ye stole the concept for the Urkel-referencing line after hearing a similar lyric on his . Carl Otis Winslow: That's wonderful, son. But I like myself, and that makes me cool. Well, actually it's Quincy, but you guys get the picture. Laura Lee Winslow: He didn't need to. Steve Urkel: Laura's got the highly infectious mucus-nasal-osis-inflamicus. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: I prefer to call it sharing. Laura Lee Winslow: Oh lord, you're gonna die. No. I got a nosebleed at birth. Carl Otis Winslow: No. Carl Otis Winslow: Like that. Harriette Winslow: Then clean it up, I'm still on strike. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh gee that'd scare me. Laura: But but, where'd you get that radioactive stuff? Steve Urkel: I have a spectacular evening planned! Steve Urkel: Oh, why not? You know, Harriette, It's the thought that counts. He opted ofr early retirement. And then there was the time we went camping and we were in dyer need of a generator and we just plugged the toaster into Uncle Elijah and the Pop Tarts were flying. Suppose I made it happen. Willie Fuffner: [sigh] That's different. [faints]. Carl Otis Winslow: Don't get cute with me Harriet. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Seymour Butts? Steve Urkel: Why, of course it can! Laura: Remember when you tried to teach me how to sew? and-so-the-balance-shifts-blog. You had an accident. Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I just feel so helpless! Eddie: Man, I don't have time to study. Empty the cash register! Carl Otis Winslow: I'll tell you what son, why not give me cash for Christmas. Cassie Lynn: Well, we just got some really hot photos of you being romanced by the Prince of Passion here. Ms. Steuben: Uh, excuse us just a minute. Steve Urkel: Why? Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? Harriette Winslow: [Takes an envelope from Carl] 'Lose Weight, Feel Great at Chicago's Premiere Health Spa, Hip Whippers'. Hey Steve, would you like a breast? Harriette Winslow: Carl, out first table was next to the entrance where everybody was waiting to be seated. Carl Otis Winslow: [packing up the camping gear] Boy that was great, a family weekend in the wilderness. Steve Urkel: How tough am I? Okay, first question. No, you're not invited. Let's just hope we can rub off on him before he rubs off on 3J. They misspelled three words. In the latter half of Family Matters, Steve started staying with the Winslows as his parents didn't want him around. Every time I ask her about it, she just cries and takes another Rolaid. They help move along our sentences. Harriette: [sobbing] Clint is driving off and Meryl will never see him again! The Ethical Issues With Stefan Urquelle In Family Matters Easy Eddo. Family Matters Quotes